[He inhales slowly, eyes closed, trying to put the haphazard way his mind works into some kind of order.]
Towards the end, no, he just wanted to stay safely perched on the fence the rest of his life. Even though part of him was smart enough to know there is no way to rest in life, that something would have knocked him on to one side or the other eventually.
When I first met him, when he had good days, I think he wanted to be the hero in his own life again. I think he wanted to live somewhere that would have given him a chance to win; or at the very least, that wouldn't have been so stacked against him.
[Did that amount to a goal? Maybe not. You can't always choose or change the life you're in, not while it's beating you into the ground. But it had been a wish.]
A wish was enough to go on around here. Back home, for any of us, wishes are just embers. Most of them burn out without a mark.
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Towards the end, no, he just wanted to stay safely perched on the fence the rest of his life. Even though part of him was smart enough to know there is no way to rest in life, that something would have knocked him on to one side or the other eventually.
When I first met him, when he had good days, I think he wanted to be the hero in his own life again. I think he wanted to live somewhere that would have given him a chance to win; or at the very least, that wouldn't have been so stacked against him.
[Did that amount to a goal? Maybe not. You can't always choose or change the life you're in, not while it's beating you into the ground. But it had been a wish.]
A wish was enough to go on around here. Back home, for any of us, wishes are just embers. Most of them burn out without a mark.